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New here, an introduction

I have urge incontinence, my mental health condition has taken it's toll on my physiology. Past few years of dealing with OAB of frequent 1-4× an hour urinations. Nearly a decade ago had to take up sleeping in diapers while medicate. I live with a life long ComplexPTSD condition, from on going experiences of trauma from being born 3 months premature due to alcohol/nicotine poisoning to the age of 15 when my psyche began to emotional numb itself to cope. Memory un-repression began to effect my sleep at age 21. Over the following decade sleep would include psychosubmatic bursing and the destruction of my teeth. By age 31 after finally completed my BFA, my stress disorder could handle juggling full time work/ full time education/ full time life. I stop myself from walking out in front of a truck, no seriously, after talking myself mentally out of the act, my legs were continuing to progress to intersect the path of s mac truck. I faught to get control back. I no longer was able to stay asleep with medication. My mind and body developed avoidance tactics to stay sway from subjected to subconscious memories of terror. Abuse, fighting, infant neglect, and even had a 10 year old neighbor bully make 4 year old me preform oral on him twice.... All recoursing through my subconscious daily in the way of emotions episodes. Can't say I ever asked to been through all that nor to have it wrecke havoc on my body as a I mature and age as an adult. I can at least look at my diapers as quasi therapeutic giving attention to a neglected inner child. But now being 24/7 urinary issues, my state's Medicaid joke of wearing 2 attends and changing an unnecessary number of times of day. Often defective/problematic product issues during diapering/changing. Additionally beginning to notice a smell, the factor of middle aged man anatomy in a cheap product designed to changed hourly for hospital use. Um I'm not in a hospital so my life can't have the convenience of changing myself more often than a newborn. Bad enough when the OAB had running back and forth. I've used/tried other products over the years. If I wasn't low-income/disabled I wouldn't be asking Medicaid for help. But become of conditions in which I had no choice, with exception of looking out for my health and well being. As I've worked myself through therapies over the years, I was up till recently a facilitator of self-help groups. I'm well versed as being one to listen and offer advice, it's at least anyone can I feel. Just need better help getting better diapers and willing to listen and help other guys like myself cope with things like urinary incontinence.