Piper, Yes, all this can be very intimidating, frustrating and embarrassing. My issues did not start quite as young as yours, but I've been dealing with this for over 20 years. One thing to remember is that your incontinence and need for diapers does not define who you are. The diapers are just different underwear that allow us to live a very normal life. It took me a while to get used to wearing protection 24/7 and I too was always worried that someone would know. I found that it is much less embarrassing to wear enough protection to prevent leaks than to have a leak on my clothes that people can see. Now I don't feel protected if I don't have on a very thick diaper. It does take some getting used to, but it will get better. If you're doubling up on diapers at night, be sure to cut some slits in the first one so moisture can get to the second one. Otherwise moisture will just flow out the sides of the first diaper and you will still leak. Let us know if the samples from Northshore come and if they are working. Good news on getting the appointment moved up. Don't be embarrassed to wear protection to that appointment, better than wet clothes and they see everything! Really take time to learn about the surgery and maybe even a second opinion if you can. Be sure to try the Mega-Max for overnight and the Air Supreme for daytime from Northshore. Email me if you want to talk more.